MY STORY
Rachel Attia
STORY
My Story
I am the mother of three children, Yuval (17), Ofir (14) and Amit (11).
I remember when my first child Yuval was born. She was my world! I didn’t care about anything else but her. I spent two years at home with her, and although it was exhausting at times, I enjoyed being a new mother.
I gave birth to my second child Ofir when Yuval was three and a half. Suddenly, Ofir was the focus of all my attention. She was the baby now, and I thought she needed me more.
I remember times when I got so angry and frustrated with Yuval because she didn’t do what I told her to do. As time went on, things got progressively worse. There was one night when Yuval didn’t want to go to bed and I become so angry I screamed at her the way you would scream at an adult.​
In my bed that night, I thought about what I did and it made me feel horrible. I couldn’t sleep because I felt so guilty. I thought that I was a bad mother. I was at a loss at to what to do - how did it get to the point where I expected my 4 year old daughter to behave and understand things on the level of a teenager?
I was filled with feelings of guilt, anger and helplessness but most of all - I felt like a horrible mom. And I always thought I would be a great mom. I always told myself I would never be like my mother, who was never there for me, who was always drunk, and didn’t have any connection to me. Now here I was, screaming and yelling, just like my mom. I wasn’t able to see that I was rejecting my own child when really, she just needed me.
The following morning I decided that I needed help. I needed someone that could guide me and show me a better way of being a parent. I wanted to raise my children and have a connection with them. I wanted to create a relationship where they would feel supported, cared for, loved and respected.
I researched information about parenting, and I ended up inviting a parenting coach to my home. She stayed in my house for a whole week and showed my husband and I that Yuval was still a baby herself and we should have treated her as one.
We signed up for a year of family coaching and had a weekly session with her. As children grew, we learned how to be better parents, and that brought us closer to our children. Today, Yuval is 17 and if you ask her who her best friend is, she’ll tell you - her mom and dad. Same goes for Ofir (14) and Amit (11).
With the right guidance we learned how kids, no matter what their age, should be treated, and our children really respect us and love us for that. As a result of the changes I made in my life, I decided that my life’s mission is to help other parents to change their relationships with their children. Even when kids are teenagers or young adults, it’s possible to create a different and positive experience.
What I have learned over the years is that it is NEVER too late to create better relationships with our children. Having them share their happy as well as sad moments with us, is, after all, why as parents we are here. When your children feel safe and close to you, they will tell you everything.
Our goal is to introduce our clients to the successful systems and tools in order to approach their specific challenges. Through this powerful process, our clients are encouraged to uncover the underlying issues and together we can work to overcome them. Issues transform into positive realizations, and these, too, can impact family, work and society only for the better!
In finding ways of expressing and accepting encouragement and respect, we feel fulfilled and optimistic.